Muggle Sarcasm II: Draco's Revenge
by jessica499499
Summary: Sequel to Muggle Sarcasm And Rita Skeeter Don't Mix. Draco promised that Rita Skeeter would pay for bad mouthing his husband and he gets his revenge in a most unusual way. Slash. Drarry. Fluffy.


Rita Skeeter was walking her tiny Pomeranian like she did every day after a hard day's work and was enjoying herself immensely. She'd had a great day and the posting of her newest story had caused quite an uproar at the office. She loved watching people get excited about her work. Hearing that juicy bit of gossip had been like finding the Dead Sea scrolls for her. She knew that Harry Potter would give her the greatest headline of her career again.

Ever since the war ended hot topics had been scarce and Harry had taken to….She shuddered to think about it…..domestication. She thought she'd have to wait till him and Draco had children before she could get anything from the famous couple. But fate had been kind to her, letting her overhear the tasty bit of gossip between Granger and Potter. Plotting so openly, what fools. She was just beaming as she walked her little dog around waited for him to do his business. Suddenly the air was filled with an evil crackling and the sky darkened around her. A shiver went down her spine as her dog whimpered and hid behind her.

"Gossip, what's wrong?" She asked the tiny pup. The little puffball just whined louder and began pulling his mistress back towards home. Sadly his owner ignored his warning and stared at the darkening clouds.

"I don't recall the forecast mentioning rain. How odd."

Things got odder still as something billowing and black burst forth from the clouds.

Her years of spying on the Potter/Malfoys made it easy for her to make out the handsome features of Draco Malfoy as he soared over her on his broom.

The blonde threw his head back and let out such an evil bellowing chuckle that Rita felt a shiver of fear trail down her spine that she couldn't repress. Lightning flashed menacingly around him and made him seem like an apparition from one of her nightmares. She fell back in shock and Gossip jumped straight into her arms.

Draco swooped down from the sky until he was hovering over her in the most menacing fashion imaginable.

"Well well, what have we here? A little witch who thinks she can slander my husband and get away with it? I wouldn't want to be in your shoes right now."

Draco's eyes shone brightly from the lightning and his smile was just short of deranged.

With a dramatic flick of his wand to the sky Draco summoned up a strike of lightning that scorched the ground at her feet.

Rita scooted back as far as possible and wobbled to her feet as fast as she could. Clutching her dog tightly Rita ran away from the enraged wizard in blind fear.

Draco laughed loudly in glee and sent multiple strikes of lightning after her.

"I'll get you Rita! You and your little dog too!" He bellowed.

Rita shrieked all the way home and as soon as she was out of sight Draco dispelled the storm around him and lowered himself back to the ground.

"Enjoy the show Darling?" He asked the empty air.

A disembodied chuckle answered him as Harry removed his cloak from his shoulders.

"Immensely my love. Quite a well chosen quote I must add. I had a feeling you would be fond of the Wizard of Oz once you watched it. Maybe someday Rita will understand your little joke. What do you say we send her a copy of the movie for Christmas? Maybe with a little note about how easy it would be to pour a bucket of water over her. At least she'll get the reference then."

Draco wrapped his arms tightly around his husband's waist and kissed his cheek.

"I fear you're over estimating her intelligence Dear. My method was much more….direct."

Harry laughed lightly and hugged Draco back.

"Indeed it was. We certainly taught her a lesson about messing around with my good name. She may not understand sarcasm and muggle references but she certainly understood your message loud and clear. I'm very proud."

"Proud enough to forgive me with messing with your little ginger haired friend?" He asked tentatively.

Harry grinned and nuzzled into the blonde's neck.

"Why don't we go home and talk about it after a little bit of fun?" He whispered into his lover's ear.

Draco smiled and held Harry even closer as he used his magic to get them back to their flat.

"There's no place like home." He quoted as they vanished from sight, leaving nothing but a swirl of dust and a trail of scorch marks on the ground.

In the distance Rita was still screaming.

* * *

><p>I've been meaning to do this sequel forever after all the great response I got for the first one, but I couldn't get the wording right. It took me forever to get to this version after I got into Star Trek. I promise I'm working on A Memory to Forget too, but my writer's block is killing me. All my Harry Potter inspiration was stolen by my new obsession with Spirk. I'm trying to get back into it though so keep your eyes open for more! Reviews=Love.<p>

P.S: I have to warn you all that my internet might be lost soon, so I may not be able to post as often as I would like, but this should give me much more time to write. Be patient please and pray that I get it back before I go crazy from Fanfic withdrawal. It's happened before to greater people than me.

Yours truly,

Jessica499499


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